The shortest answer to a very complicated question is that we are human. We have different perceptions, different actions, and different backgrounds that we use as a frame of reference which influence our emotions. And the truth is, because we are unique, no one set of “rules” will work for everyone. It can even be said that, you might find your own true happiness if you do not follow any set of “rules”.
So do not look at the following habits as “rules” to follow in order to be happier. Instead, see them as guidelines, and adjust as needed. Try to do those that work for you to the best of your ability and never feel guilty if you do not seem to be able to make a habit out of them. This simply means that it does not come natural to you, or in other words, it is not suited for your personality. Move on without regret. Find your own unique set of “rules” that works for you!
1. DO NOT COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS
As previously stated, we are all different, we are unique. We do not think, do or feel the same. So try to not compare yourself to others. Embrace your uniqueness. Do not apologise for who you are, but rather celebrate who you are.
2. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE
Distance yourself from people that always find a reason to complain. Be selective in your choice of friends. It is hard to be happy when your friends cannot be happy with you or always bring you down.
3. REALISE THAT YOU DO NOT NEED OTHERS APPROVAL
The saying: “You can’t keep everyone happy” is very true and can be very tiring. So accept that you are not responsible for others happiness, but for your own. Once you do not have to carry that weight around with you, you will feel happier already.
4. BE HONEST
Lying causes a lot of stress, so try to avoid lying and rather be honest. Honesty may hurt a person’s feeling for a moment, but lying has far more devastating effects as well as not being good for your health. You can be honest while being considerate.
5. LET GO OF GRUDGES
We all make mistakes, and sometimes those mistakes can hurt us and others. Holding on to that hurt hampers the quality of our lives. So resolve a matter as quickly as possible and let go of it. If the person that did you wrong, do not want to resolve it, try not to dwell on it. Make peace with your emotions and go on with your life. If you do not let go, you allow negative emotions to dictate your life.
6. TREAT OTHERS WITH KINDNESS
Try and always treat others with kindness and respect. Do not judge as you do not know what is happening in other people’s lives. Being kind to others also boost your own happiness and you never know what a kind word or smile can mean for another person.
7. ACCEPT WHAT YOU CANNOT CHANGE
You should understand that you will not have a perfect life. There will be problems and there will be days that you feel unhappy. Accept that it is part of life, and that nothing in life is permanent. The cloudy days will pass, and the sun will shine again.
Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it. - Groucho Marx